I’m starting to have a blogging- freeze, so I’m posting to break it.
I was in a dilemma
Earlier on, during my walk with Pema, I had this going on in my head (are you ready?):
I want to make a difference in the world, to help people wake up. I have some wisdom. I have no wisdom. It should be fast and clean. It’s gradual and messy. I should take teachings mainly from my meditation teacher. I’m loving these teachings from a Buddhist teacher. I should set up a rhythm to blogging and commit to it. There is so much to write about. If I write everything now, I will run out of things to say. I will need to write posts in advance for when I’m teaching (at least 10 days per month). If I write loads of posts and then nothing/little for a while, people won’t like it. I need to be more expert and complete. I need to be more raw. If I talk a lot about realisations from Pema it’ll be like a Buddhist blog. And I’m not a Buddhist. But I might want to be. I need to make each idea a separate post, rather than blurting stuff out. I must save my noticings for Fridays. If I meta-blog too much people will get bored.
Hyuh. It was messy.
I applied my own advice to myself – I Found Five
One of the major things was the how-many-posts-and-how-often-and-how-often bit. So…
1. I should blog with a regular schedule and not ebb and flow. I should ignore/iron out the irregular parts of my schedule.
Here are four more (remember: possible, not necessarily probable) that I came up with in about 60 seconds in the pouring rain:
If I follow my own rhythms:
2. …it could set a new standard for bloggers and Seth Godin (or whoever) will fall in love with me (or my blog at least).
3. …I will end up blogging to myself and lose all credibility.
4. … it’ll be a non-event.
5. … it will clear room for bigger realisations.
I’m learning two things
From this, I realised I’m doing two things at the same time:
1. Learning about conflict
2. Learning how to blog as me
No wonder I’m getting confused – I’m on a much steeper learning curve than I thought I was.
So, hmmm…
My maybe-sort-of-unconclusion
If I feel uncomfortable about something, I don’t have to do it.
And, you know, I’m a bit of an ebb-and-flow, fall-into-it-then-move-on kind of guy.
And… as of January, I’m going to be teaching at least 10 days a month.
But who says I can’t let the blog reflect the rhythms of my life?
(Well, actually, pretty much everyone I’ve ever read on blogging.)
So, dammit, I will.
I think.
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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Sending sympathy for the struggles with blogging as yourself. I have to talk myself through each new step I take on the Internet. I have to say, the results have been mostly neutral-to-positive so far, but the fear still shows up.
I, for one, am interested in reading what you post, when you post it. That’s what twitter is for – to let me know when you’ve posted, when there isn’t a regular schedule.
I’m curious if you’ve encountered the Drama Triangle, and whether you find it helpful in thinking about conflict. (link below)
Best wishes!
Sonia
Sonia’s latest article Compassion for the Drama Triangle
you know someone from the webby world said similar to me about being regular with blogs…. and as a blog reader I ‘SOD THAT’
I read blogs like this because I want inspiration and to feel connected to the human tapping at the keyboard. What is with these co-dependent ‘must be regular’ types. Imagine sitting in a room with a person you like but who only talks at 10 minute intervals whether they have something to say or not … WEIRD!!!!!!
Because you’re being you is why I read your blog!!!!!…..
Well, bless you both for voicing support.
Feeling better about it all as I get things in perspective.