Here’s what I might want taught to kids and adults about conflict resolution, in an if-I-ruled-the-world-it-would-be-a-hell-of-a-lot-more-peaceful-and-fair kind of way.
(I’ve been reading Seth Godin’s new book Linchpin: Are You Indispensable?
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Andrew’s Tentative Manifesto For A More Peaceful World
~ Sometimes other people see things in such an appallingly ridiculously different way from you, and it still doesn’t mean that they are wrong. Nor that you’re right.
~ Calmness is not necessarily the thing – people do all kinds of terrible things without getting worked up in the slightest.
~ If we can learn what these things look and more importantly feel like, it might make reduce their efficacy: emotional manipulation, propaganda, fundamentalism.
~ If we had a working knowledge of these things, people might make more sensible decisions: cognitive biases, statistics, probability.
~ Speak on what you feel strongly in a way that can be heard. Hint: start with providing tentative conclusions, encouraging criticism and discussion (if your idea is any good, it can take it) and using emotional language sparingly.
~ Distrust both drama and the feeling of certainty.
~ Learn the effects of emotions on the ability to process information, and guard against those effects.
~ Practice listening without interrupting either out loud or silently.
~ Appreciate that certainty does not equal truth.
~ Guard against the urge to evangelise – god speaks only to you about you, not through you to others. If she wants to speak to anyone else, let her do it direct. Short version: let your example be the inspiration.
~ Above all, make it a priority to stay conscious and open to the present moment.
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Now where do I find the boss around here?
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