Shining the light on the who-am-I-to-do-this demon

by Andrew Lightheart

I had a conversation over coffee and cake with my friend Emma couple of weeks ago.

I brought up my fear of ‘Who am I to be doing this?’

Largely, I’ve gotten over this terrible scourge that blights the life of knowledge professionals everywhere.

But, you know, still there. A bit.

My first reaction is to start making up professional polished things to tell you.

But here’s the truth.

Who am I to teach you to get better at difficult conversations?

I am the shy kid, who cried when the whole class was kept behind because he hated being in trouble.

I am the one who got picked last at sports. Not a metaphor. In fact, I am the kid who argued with this PE teacher at age nine about why he didn’t need to do PE. ‘But you wouldn’t say that about Maths!’ he said. ‘I’ll NEED Maths!’ I said.

I am the kid who hated going outside at lunch break, and couldn’t believe his luck when he found out that at Upper School you can stay inside and read!

I am the kid who, when my Mum bought a new appliance, would read the manual cover to cover. I still love knowing how things work. In fact, I went to a conference last year for the people who write the manuals and the help text and a whole bunch of other very very cool stuff and had THE BEST TIME.

I am the kid who read his parents’ copy of ‘How to Talk So Kids Listen…’ at age 10 and thought his parents could do with using it more.

I’ve come here via a whole bunch of circuitous routes. I trained (or half-trained) as a sign language interpreter, holistic aromatherapist, NLP Master Business Practitioner Coach Grand Poobah, IT trainer. I’m glad I’m not doing any of them now, but at least I tried. I’ve worked in shops, bars, restaurants, theatres. McDonalds. I’ve run my own training business for eight years. It’s taken a while to get here.

I’ve meditated every day (give or take) for ten years. What? It’s gotta count for SOMETHING.

Bottom line: I think about this stuff. A lot. A LOT. It’s the centre of my life.

It’s not that I think I know more about it. It’s just that you probably don’t have the time to think about this stuff that much. So it’s my job to think about it on your behalf and then poke you.

Oh.

It’s my job to do that.

It’s my job.

To do that.

Huh.

HUH.

Cool job.

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